Fire. Bad.

Edr0 came by last night to play a little Tiger Woods 2006 with me. He left at 2am then the phone rings.

Me: Hello?
Edr0: I’m driving by (a park near my house) and there’s a guy on fire!
Me: WHAT???
Edr0: There’s a guy on fire head to toe!
Me: WHAT??? What’s he doing? Did you tell him to stop, drop and roll?
Edr0: I called 9-1-1 and I’m turning around…wait, where the fuck did he go?
Me: What do you see? Are you getting out of the car? Where did he go?
Edr0: I don’t know. He’s not here now. I’ll call you back.

5 minutes later the phone rings again.

Edr0: The paramedics came
Me: Do they think you’re a whacko?
Edr0: No, they looked around and couldn’t find him. They found his burned shoe and a bottle of rubbing alcohol.
Me: Well, that’s fucking weird.
Edr0: Fuck yeah, it’s weird. Do you think they will give me a ticket for calling them?
Me: No, you are a concerned citizen making a legitimate call regarding a possible dangerous situation. It was a fucking dude on fire, come on. He’s probably tripping on acid or something, playing with fire and it got out of hand so he took off.
Edr0: I’m going home now. I think I need a drink.