October

It's October finally. I really love October. It's one of my favorite months, unfortunately it's not as good when money is super tight like now. Costumes are expensive and our annual party costs a bit, not to mention Mau's birthday and our anniversary are smack dab in the middle of it all. Mau did get a job...a continuation of the temp job until something better comes along. He will also try to work a few nights at either Thai or the Chinese restaurant to make sure we have enough for taxes and Xmas. In the meantime, my wonderful father is helping me pay my health insurance premiums.

I suppose I should do an update on my dad. He's doing better. He says he can walk upstairs if he uses both railings and he can get around pretty good with a cane. He says he's still got a distinct limp but he will talk to his cardiologist next week and ask if that will improve with time. He was told not to drive for 6 weeks but nothing stops my die-hard dad. He's been driving to Longview (Washington, about an hour away) to see his new g/f. Yes, girlfriend. Slightly strange but I also have a feeling the meaning of g/f at age 78 is different than what it means at a much younger age. She's a twice widow (careful of the kiss of death dad) and they lived next door to each other 50 years ago when my mom was still living and the kids not born yet. He's happy and I know he's lonely so he needs a companion. I just would rather not see a marriage happen out of this...not to be greedy but it's MY money, you know? Not the money of some woman I have never met in my life. And I would prefer my sister and I to be making any major decisions regarding his life that he cannot make. Don't get me wrong, I want him to be happy though.

I get to see Dr S on Monday finally. Not too exciting since my issues don't involve him right now I don't think. I just need more Valium basically. My important appointment is next Friday...7 long days away. Everyday is a struggle now and my brain is exhausted from trying to self diagnose myself. My heart acts up more often...from maybe 3 times per day to about 20 times now. When it happens, I get dull pains in the middle of my back and nearly pass out then I get confused for a few minutes as to where I am. This is making me anxious and scared to go places or be by myself for any length of time. I am scared to play DDR as it's such an endurance game. I try to ignore my heart and keep playing (if it does it while I am playing) but yesterday I got tunnel vision, started blacking out and jumped off in mid song. It scared the fuck out of me so I stopped playing.

With all this, Mau not making nearly enough money and I really don't have any friends, I am getting very depressed lately. Edr0 left for California on Wednesday so that X's off another friend out of the 2 left.

UPDATE: Edr0 just called while I was typing this wanting to talk to Mau because he's trying to find Venice Beach and he's lost at a pay phone. Oh boy. His g/f's sister was supposed to line him up with a job but he said "she hasn't really mentioned it". So he's applying at restaurants and stuff...you know, those type of jobs that make it really easy to get by in So.CA. He sounded kind of strange, kind of homesick and nervous. Bets are open!

Sky bowled much better this week. His average is a 28 and he bowled well over that every game and his team won every game too! He bowled a 64. I feared I might have to make good on my promise of buying him his own ball when he bowls a 75. The trick this week was him using a heavier ball and it seemed to stick to the lane much better. The little old lady who runs the youth league said she's got something special for Sky that she would bring next week...I don't know what that means. I think we talked Mary Jo and Keith into joining our league and Sue and Ryan said they were interested too. It would be nice to have some people we know there too. It's 2 person mixed so we'd play against them some weeks which might help our rankings :P